Gulf Pine Catholic

Gulf Pine Catholic • April 14, 2023 10 What does a 75-year-old man know about women’s fashion? Nothing. What does a 75-year-old retired priest know about woman’s fashions? Absolutely nothing. The only thing a retired priest can say when asked about women’s fashion, is to say nothing. Well, not say- ing nothing, but not saying things that might offend, embarrass, be judgmental or cause the recipient to break down in tears. He should refrain from such emotive judgmental words as “ugly,” “doesn’t suit you,” “Is not your type,” “Is not your colour.” “Makes you look….” Malia, my 24-year-old niece arrived at my house with a request, “I am going to Galway to look for some outfits for a wedding and some parties we will be having at work. Would you like to come along?” I felt like saying: What do I know about wedding attire or what a woman should wear to a party? I am a proverbial black suit man myself when I attend wed- dings which is rarely anymore. Instead I simply said, “Ok! I will go with you.” I knew the trip would become an educa- tional experience that would be couched in less input from me and more non-invasive comments. Obviously, I had to show some interest in the engagement. I had to ask educational questions that would show my inter- est in the task at hand. I had to show that I really appreciated the invitation to be part of the fact finding mission even if my input and contribution to the process was minimal. I had learned from past shopping experiences not to suggest check- ing out certain stores. That was to become the sole responsi- bility of the decision maker. The shopping experience began with yours truly trying to keep up with her youthful pace, as she, with a sense of de- termination, marched into a store. It was no surprise to me that the store was an all-women’s apparel store. As I followed my niece into the store, a quick glance around the store and its shopping clientele, reminded me that it was a place that men didn’t frequent. In fact, looking around, no man could be seem, even as a cashier. Undaunted, I persevered and fol- lowed my niece around the store from clothes rack to clothes rack. To show my interest, I asked, “Are there certain colours or styles you are interested in?” Immune to my question, she continued to search. Momentarily, she would pause and pull out an outfit that caught her eye. In my diplomatic way, I volunteered, “I like that colour. I think it would look good on you?” I was greeted with, “Here” Hold this for me.!” I reached out my left arm to hold her first choice. The search continued. Soon, my arm was weighted down with another outfit, and another and another. As I followed her around, I still felt inclined to offer some non commitual comments, “Of the ones you have chosen so far, I like the… best. I could see you wearing the ...... one and it would look good on you.” Then, it was the turn to look for matching shoes. She picked out a matching pair of shoes that had pretty high heels. As she tried them on, I asked her, “Do you want to get shoes with such high heels? Can you wear them? After all, you are almost six foot tall.” The shoes were returned to their previ- ous resting place. “I am going to try on these outfits,” she said, pointing to my outstretched arms. And off she went to the fitting room. Obviously, I was not going to hang around as the lone male figure in the store so I told my niece I would visit some more generic stores while she was trying on and deciding on outfits. Sometime later, I returned, glanced around to discover fit- ting on and deciding was still in progress, so I made a quick exit again. Later, I returned to discover my niece at the check- out counter and realized she had made her decisions. Exit- ing the store, she revealed her choices and, of course, I af- firmed them by commenting, “You made good choices.” We celebrated her purchases with dinner at one of her favourite restaurants and headed for home sometime later. On the fifty-mile journey home, we chatted, not about her purchases and the choices she made, but just about life in general. I began to realize that my input and involvement in her decisions what to purchase for attending a wedding or work party was minimal. What was more important was the qual- ity time we spent together as adults. The shopping experience was less a distraction and more of a learning experience. By the way, my niece did look stunning in her wedding outfit choice while I looked just as priestly as ever in my black. Father Michael Tracey is retired and lives in Ireland. He can be contacted by email at mtracey1@bellsouth.net . His website is www.michaeltracey.net What does a 75-year-old man know about….? Across the Pond Father Tracey A new intergenerational covenant Among the important issues involving the dignity of human life, abortion is of prime importance -- but it is not the only pro-life issue. As Little Sisters we are deeply concerned about the “other end” of the pro-life spectrum -- the care of the sick, the elderly and the dying. In his landmark encyclical, Evangelium Vitae , Pope John Paul II wrote, “Neglect of the elderly or their out- right rejection are intolerable. Their presence in the family, or at least their closeness to the family in cases where limited living space or other reasons make this impossible, is of fundamental importance in creating a climate of mutual interaction and enriching communi- cation between the different age-groups. It is therefore important to preserve, or to re-establish where it has been lost, a sort of ‘covenant’ between generations.” Today our society is very far from Pope John Paul II’s vision. Pope Francis often speaks of the “throwaway cul- ture” to describe the neglect and abandonment of those considered useless, particularly the very young and the very old. Francis’ concept of the throwaway culture aligns with what John Paul II termed the culture of death. I am convinced that the scarcity of religious voca- tions, including vocations to our Congregation, is re- lated to this culture of death. A decrease in the number of young women joining our community may also be related to the fact that many young people today grow up far from their elders, without roots, as Pope Fran- cis often says. From Little Sisters who share their vocation stories, it is evident that a close and loving relationship with grandparents or other family elders is often the spark that lights the flame of a vocation at the service of the elderly. For several years now, the Little Sisters have also been grappling with the same work- force issues faced by other providers of senior care. In the aftermath of the pandemic 99 percent of U.S. nursing homes and 96 percent of assisted living com- munities are dealing with staffing shortages. Over 300 U.S. nursing homes closed during the pan- demic and two-thirds of the remaining nursing homes are at risk of closing. Today over 800,000 needy older adults and people with disabilities are languishing on Medicaid-funded state waiting lists without caregivers to provide needed services. By 2030, 3.5 million new workers will be needed in long-term care services just to keep pace with our rapidly aging population. Without dramatic changes, thousands of older adults and their families will lose access to quality care, creat- ing fertile ground for the legalization of assisted suicide and euthanasia. I share these frightening statistics not to be a prophet of doom but to issue a call to prayer and action! There are many things we can do today to nurture a covenant between generations and a more caring cul- ture. If you are a young person, OPEN YOUR HEART to the seniors in your life, and to the possibility that God is calling you to a career or a vocation of service to the elderly. Don’t be afraid to contact the Little Sisters! Our life shared with the elderly, lived in the spirit of the Beati- tudes, is a beautiful, joy-filled life! PRAY that young people will be drawn to careers in geriatrics/gerontology … and even better, to life-long vocations at the service of the elderly! CREATE opportunities for intergenerational en- counters and ENCOURAGE youth to explore a caring profession, or … a priestly or religious vocation! AFFIRM LIFE by helping the seniors you know to pursue what is most meaningful to them. Spend time with the elders in your family; volunteer in a home for the elderly. Show esteem and support to those who work in caring professions and thank them for their service. SEE SISTER CONSTANCE, PAGE 14 Guest Columnist Sister Veit